A Special Needs Moms Biggest Fear...Realized

Everyone worries about their children whether they are typically developing or have special needs. I know first hand as I have one of each myself. The difference with having a special needs child is that you always worry that the people who are supposed to be watching them at a given time, won't know the extent of their needs and they could end up slipping though the cracks. We have a wonderful team and we don't go out without our kids very often so aside from therapists, family members and teachers, we don't have that many people watching our son that don't know everything they need to know about  him.  Our son is amazing and for the most part he is very easy going and easy to care for but you do have to keep an eye on him because he will follow a crowd on occasion not realizing that he isn't supposed to be going where they are going.

Yesterday he started a new therapy camp program that we have been researching for a few years. We finally decided to enroll this year as it's a little bit intensive and we felt it would be perfect right before he starts Kindergarten. His first day went very well and we really like his teacher however we haven't had a chance to meet each assistant as they   alternate depending on where they are most needed. Today I went to pick him up and unlike yesterday when I arrived 5 minutes early to watch the class, I arrived exactly on time. I went in the front door into the lobby and as I was about to walk into the waiting room the door opened and a mom and her 3 kids walked out the door... and my baby walked out too! I was shocked to see him but wasn't worried yet because I assumed his teacher was in the waiting room and had seen me come in. When I walked in the room all I saw were a few kids and their parents but none of the teachers or staff.

I walked him down the hall to his room and his teacher was on the phone dealing with a situation with another child and the assistant was just standing there. I asked her why in the world my son just walked out the door and asked her if she realized what could have happened if I had not walked in at that exact moment. I don't even want to think about it but all I can say is that just beyond that door that I caught him at is a tiny sidewalk and then a huge parking lot. The family didn't know he was following them so he would have been outside all alone. I can't let the thoughts go further than that but I am horrified.

The assistant didn't act shocked or sick she just kinda said sorry and told me he had a good day when I asked. The teacher was sort of frantic in her own situation so she had to rush off but before she left she said I'm not usually on the phone I'm dealing with another parent. I said I don't care if you are on the phone I just want to know why no one was watching my son! We left and got in the car but I was not only seething mad but simply sick inside.

I called the front desk from the parking lot and left a message for the director, with the receptionist who was also sick about what had happened. I got a call back about 20 minutes later and she reacted the way I had hoped she would. She said that the staff was waiting for her after her meeting so that they could tell her how they had messed up. After she gave them a long lecture they created a new protocol and will be implementing it starting tomorrow and going forward. They will have yet another staff member be on duty at pick up time to stand by the door and wait for each parent to arrive and get their child.

All kids need to be watched and I would have been a little upset if my other son had been in the wrong place but the difference is that he knows where he is supposed to be where my older son often sees his friends going somewhere and likes to follow them.  I'm really a non-alarmist and have been contacted by the schools many times about little bumps and bruises and I always say don't worry if they are happy now they are fine. I don't react strongly and I know and understand that we are human and things happen. This though is so different because the ending could have been so horribly different. What if I didn't show up the exact second that I did? What if I had pulled in and he was standing outside on the sidewalk or in the parking lot? Or.... worse? There are 3 teachers to watch 7 kids so even though they may need a bit more attention it is still a great ratio and should not be a problem.

The director apologized and explained how upset she was and that everyone was aware of how serious this was and ultimately could have been. I'm slowly letting it go but I still feel awful and it is hard to take my baby back to a place and trust that he is in good hands after this. I'm a little uncomfortable but I know they will use their new plan from now on and I know this is the right program for him. This is one of those days that a special needs mom dreads the most. I hope tomorrow is much better.